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The guy who hacked tumblr
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Newest registered user: Dolce21dsisBack
One day, a guy named Phil who lived in a mental asylum discovered 4chan. He loved the place. There were many people just like him. He belonged.
In 4chan he felt free to be racist, to make fun of children with Down syndrome, to make 9/11 jokes and there would be no one up his ass about it.
But everything changed when the faggot nation attacked.
There existed a place full of faggots. No man had ever walked in an out of there alive. A place where logic itself is distorted to suit the needs of retarded preteens with unrealistic views of reality, yet anyone who didn't follow the ways of their hiveminded circle jerks, were put to death with a spamming ritual in which they overflowed your inbox with nonsense so cringe worthy, that it'd force your mind to yse an evolutionary trait made to forcefully make your exit from this world in order to be in a dimension seperate from beings of such stupidity.
This disaster of a place was called Tumblr. It was created when a nationwide exorcism took place, but went horribly wrong. It was originally made to help everyone gain knowledge, but failed in the most awful way. Thus, tumblr was born. A place where people THINK they have the highest level of intelligence.
You see, tumblrs pride had got the best of itself once again, and this time their citizens decided to attempt to pull the stunt of declaring war on 4chan.
"We did it for the vine."
Claimed General C. Faggotry of the tumblr nation.
Many citizens of the 4chan nation cringed so hard that they died. The tumblrs efforts were still futile. Phil would not tolerate this.
He hacked tumblr and made it so that whenever someone tried to go to the website, they were redirected to r/atheism of reddit. Many members of r/atheism cringed so hard at the stupidity of the tumblr users that they died. The rest of them stayed up for three weeks strait arguing with the users of tumblr that just could not comprehend the concept of "logic" that they died from starvation because of how focused they were on the ongoing arguments.
The same happened for tumblr users as well. They argued for so long they forgot to eat and died. It was the ultimate act of genocide and it was all thanks to Phil.
2014-07-24 23:23:28