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CON: Edwin's 'Suicide'
SMOGamerX (2015-01-11 22:57:11)Im dead? I KNEW IT!
Remember: Just when the caterpillar thought its world was over, it turned into a butterfly!
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This is the date of Edwin’s assured demise. After years of his disgustingly horrible life, I have taken it upon myself to assist him dying. He has not mentioned any suicidal thoughts or actions; he does not have scrapes from razors and knives up his arms, but I still believe that he deserves to be with the gods. I suggested that we meet today. Edwin was jubilant that he’d have the opportunity to see me, but the overwhelming reality was the contrary. I had not told of my plans to Edwin, because he would most likely attempt to stop me. But this needed to be done. I brought along with me, 2 bottles of Dom Pérignon with me; only one of them was filled with champagne. Edwin and I met at a small coffee shop on 5th avenue. I told him of the expensive, exotic champagne that I had accumulated for us that night. He was overjoyed at the thought of tasting the sweet taste of Dom Pérignon. Unfortunately, he wouldn’t be able to, even that night. I took him to a bar nearby. I took the wines out of my jacket pockets and handed him a bottle. I took my bottle; which was filled with the actual drink. Edwin’s was filled to the neck with ChorOphorm. He hadn’t realized the fact of the matter until we were a block from his home, and he smelled the scent of the substance. He fell fast; not necessarily hard, but quickly. He hadn’t died; he was merely unconscious. I carried the man to his home, and set him on the living room floor. I used a necktie to hang him from his bedroom door’s knob. I had him sitting in a chair; suspended at an angle from his door. I knew from past experience, that in 18 short minutes, he would be killed by asphyxiation. In about 5 minutes, if he were to wake up, he would not move, because the lack of oxygen to the brain would cause him to lay there until he became unconscious again. I waited there; reading one of his books, while I listened to him gasp for air. His attempts were futile, as he could not move at that point. He sputtered the word, “Why?†I would have told him why, if it were of salience. But I digress; the point is, that he is now in hell, which is probably much less painful than the alternative. For him to stay on this godless world, with no help from anybody, would’ve driven him crazy at some point. I used this as my fix; the only joy I get out of life, is dismembering people for no apparent rationale. This was number 8. 2 more to go.